I don’t know if anyone will have any idea of what I’m talking about, but here goes. When I was 6th grade (back in 1999), “fine” was the like, the ultimate compliment when it came to boys. My best friend and I used to sit in my room with the yearbook out, and we would spend forever flipping through the pages and labeling the boys I liked in my class as “He is so fine!”

I think this word needs to come back in to my life, so here goes. Taylor Lautner looks so effing FINE on the set of his new movie, Abduction. He should seriously ride a motorcycle everywhere.

And a few more from today…

Those jeans are…very nice. I have no idea what this movie is about, but I will be going to see it.

See more of Taylor on set here and here!

Some new set pictures from Rob’s film Water For Elephants were released yesterday and now it’s official. Now that I know how hot he is in a tux, we must be wed. Immediately.

There a ton more of these, and you can see them over at Thinking of Rob HERE and HERE!

These are so hot, I actually *shivered* while looking at them. (I accidently typed, “hard” in that sentence first, when I mean to type “hot”. What a Freudian Slip, amirite?

That last one is my favorite. Yummy!

Check out the rest over at Thinking of Rob!

Rob and a very cute puppy. What else could you possibly need!

UNF. He is such a GQMF in this picture, even when he’s all dirty and sweaty looking. Look at his strut.

See more of Rob running on the WFE set over at Eclipse Movie!

These are presented without comment because this:

is all I can do after seeing them. I think I need to go lie down now.

Check them out at Thinking of Rob here and here because they get WAY bigger.

Fellow pervies out there, rejoice, because I have a story to share that you are going to go crazy for. You might even love it as much as you loved, “The Office”.

Yes, you read that right. I said, might be better than “The Office”!

Obviously, this story is rated M, and there are some very very explicit scenes in the story. Do not read this if you are under 18.

I actually only just heard of this story yesterday, when another amazing fic author 107yearoldvirgin (I rec’d her story Decoy earlier, so check it out if you haven’t yet!) had a quick poll on her facebook wall last night. She asked, “What’s the best sex scene you’ve read in FF?” By the time I saw it, there were about 40 replies on this wall post.

For some people, they would think, “tl;dr“, and continue on playing Soroity Life or whatever. But not me. I LIVE for threads like this! I mean, 40 replies, each most likely talking about a different scene in a story I probably have not read yet? And these are just specifically about the lemons!? OF COURSE, I’m reading it all, keeping my “to be read” list nearby!

As I dove in to the replies, I noticed a lot of people kept mentioning this story, “Last Tango In Forks”. There was a lot of talk about an, “up against the door” scene. My curiosity was sufficiently piqued.

This story caught my attention for a number of reasons. First, the title. “Last  Tango In Forks” is definitely a nod to the Marlon Brando movie, Last Tango in Paris, which happens to be rated NC-17 for explicit sexual content. You may also remember that in one of their very first promotional interviews, Rob and Kristen mentioned watching the movie together (about 45 seconds in):

So, with all this in mind, plus all of this “against the door” business, I immediately found it and began reading.

And um, holy shitballs, y’all. The reason I compare this story to “The Office” so readily is because one thing the two stories have in common is they in no way prepare you for the hotness taking place in the first one or two chapters. You get right into it, very fast. There was no force on earth that would have kept me from reading on after I got to the end of Chapter One.

As you can tell by the title, the plot of this story is based pretty heavily on the plot of the movie “Last Tango In Paris.” In case you are unfamiliar with it,(like I was, expect for the “butter scene”), Wikipedia has a synopsis, but I’m only going to share the first few sentences of it here:

Paul (Marlon Brando), a middle-aged American hotel owner mourning the suicide of his wife, meets a young engaged Parisian woman named Jeanne (Maria Schneider) in an apartment both are interested in renting. Paul and Jeanne proceed to have an anonymous sexual relationship in the apartment, and Paul demands that neither of them share any personal information, not even their names.

In all 9 chapters up so far, this very accurately describes what the story is about.

Bella, who lives in Forks with her dad and is engaged to her best friend Jacob, is feeling a little crowded still living at home. While at the gym one day, she sees that an apartment is for rent above the dance studio next door. After informing her another interested renter showed up earlier, the land lady gives Bella a key and lets her go on up to take a look herself.

As she entered the dark room, she instantly noticed how warm it was. Guess there’s nothing wrong with the heat. She slipped her jacket off and dropped it to the floor, stopping to flip the switch in there as well, just to make sure. Damn. Frustrated, she fumbled her way through the darkness until she reached the other side of the room where the large window was. It had an ancient roll up blind, and when she pulled on it the entire thing snapped up quickly, shooting dust all over her.

“Shit!” she yelled, sputtering and coughing as she brushed herself off. When she had finally composed herself, she slowly turned around the room, taking it in.

And that’s when she screamed.

Sitting on the floor facing her, right on the other side of the door she had just entered, was a man. He made no move to get up at her outburst; he simply looked up at her as if he’d only now realized that she was in the room.

“Who the fuck are you?” Bella gasped, praying that she wasn’t about to become the first in a string of brutal rape/slayings to terrorize the Pacific Northwest. She was just about to yell at him again when she actually managed to look at him.

He was leaning back against the wall with his knees hugged close to his chest, wearing a white dress shirt that was unbuttoned a few times at the collar and what looked like designer jeans that had been artificially distressed; Bella knew that there was no way jeans that clean could have so many holes in them. His hair, which looked like some exotic mixture of bronze and copper, was sticking out in every direction as if he’d been shoving his hands in it repeatedly. His cheekbones and jawline were so chiseled that it almost hurt to look at them, the thick growth of stubble only serving to enhance their beauty.

Bella moved her eyes up slowly, hovering on the most luscious pair of full, pouty lips she had ever seen in her life. They looked soft and pink, and she couldn’t help but wonder how they would feel against her own or how they might taste. Continuing upward, she took in his long, straight nose before finally landing on a sight that made her breath catch in her throat.

Piercing jade eyes stared back at her, surrounded by longer lashes than any man had the right to possess. They were swollen and red, and it was obvious that he had been crying. She had never felt like more of an intruder than she did in that moment, but she couldn’t tear her eyes away.

He looked tragic… and broken… and heartbreakingly beautiful.

Bella suddenly remembered Mrs. Cope mentioning the lovely young man who had taken the other key. Well, if that isn’t the understatement of the fucking century!

“I’m sorry,” she whispered after managing to find her voice. “I didn’t know anyone was still up here. Mrs. Cope said she thought you had left.” He said nothing, but continued to stare at her as if he could see into her soul. Feeling the need to fill the awkward silence, Bella began rambling about whatever came to her mind. “Were you thinking of taking the apartment?” She glanced around the room. “It’s a bit of a dump, to be honest, but it has potential.”

When he still didn’t answer, she walked back into the kitchen, hoping to give him a moment to collect himself. It wouldn’t stop her mouth, though, which made no sense to her because she spent most of her time avoiding contact with everyone. “These cabinets aren’t too bad,” she called out, opening and closing doors. “There’s not much counter space, though.”

She went back into the living room and began critiquing the space, wondering to herself the entire time why she couldn’t just shut the fuck up. Because you want to hear him speak to you. You want to know if his voice is as beautiful as the rest of him. Spinning around slowly, she pointed out what furniture might look good where, and nearly jumped when she turned back around to find that he was standing in the bedroom doorway watching her.

“Any idea what she’s charging for this place?” Bella whispered. Christ, he’s tall. “I sort of… forgot to ask.” She blushed deeply, once again unable to look away from him. He simply stared back at her, and when he blinked again she saw a fresh set of tears slide down his cheeks.

Knowing that she had seen, he spun around and went back into the bedroom. Worried that she’d somehow embarrassed him, she followed after him.

Bella crossed the room and propped herself on the window ledge. “Listen… I’m sure you’d love for me to get the hell out of here. Even if you don’t want the place, it’s obvious that you need some privacy.” He grimaced in response to her words but maintained eye contact. “Are you alright?” After what felt like minutes he shook his head slowly. “It’s just that… I would feel terrible if I left here and didn’t at least try to help.” She tried to smile but it felt odd under his scrutiny. After a long pause she took a deep breath and bit the bullet. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Yes,” he choked out. Although his voice sounded raw to Bella as if he’d been screaming, she wasn’t surprised to hear the musical perfection behind it.

“What can I do?” She didn’t notice that she had stopped breathing until she needed to speak.

He moved then, slowly walking towards her like a wildcat stalking its prey. The closer he got to her, the more she could feel something growing and tingling, as if an electric current was shooting between their bodies. He didn’t stop until he was right in front of her with his arms on each side of the window, effectively caging her in. He even smells beautiful.

He looked deep into her eyes for almost a minute, allowing the electricity to build between them to a breaking point.

“You can let me fuck you,” he whispered.

Uh, *GULP*.

So Bella, throwing caution to the wind, decides to do something just for herself for the first time in her life. She indulges in a positively scorching affair with a handsome stranger who seems to be dealing with some demons of his own.

This story is pretty much perfect. The lemons are amazingly hot, the characters are very developed outside of the bedroom as well, the plot moves along at a great pace, and did I mention that the sex scenes are some of the best you’ll ever read? Go stock up on extra batteries, because you WILL need them.

Links:

Last Tango in Forks on fanfiction.net

Author AwesomeSauce416 twitter account

AwesomeSauce76 author profile page on fanfiction.net: Check out this page for amazing character and story playlists!

Discuss in the comments if you’ve already been reading this!

]]> http://twilog.net/2010/06/hot-fan-fiction-recommendation-last-tango-in-forks/feed/ 1 http://twilog.net/2010/06/taylor-lautner-in-gq-holy-freakin-abs/ http://twilog.net/2010/06/taylor-lautner-in-gq-holy-freakin-abs/#comments Wed, 16 Jun 2010 00:00:16 +0000 Whitley http://twilog.net/?p=3958

We all know that Rob has been in GQ Magazine before, and now it’s Taylor’s turn! Thank God his time has finally come because these pictures are WOW, and let’s face it, the boy knows how to wear his clothes. Plus, the interview is very cute:

Lautner, 18, sits down and begins to tell me how honored he is to be here, how honored he’s been to be everywhere lately. Like at this year’s Oscars, where he introduced a tribute to horror films alongside Stewart. “I would have passed out if she wasn’t there!” Lautner says. “You’re looking down and you’re talking to George Clooney, Leonardo DiCaprio—and they’re listening to you!” This is his baseline sentiment: honest, enthusiastic bafflement. It’s probably the only suitable reaction. He talks about the MTV Video Music Awards, where he presented a trophy to his then maybe-girlfriend Taylor Swift, only to watch Kanye snatch the microphone. “I was standing behind her as it was happening, and 100 percent I was sure it was staged!” Lautner says, eyebrows raised. “I thought, ‘This was something that they rehearsed.’ I was enjoying the show! But then Taylor turned around and I saw her face.”

Just then, at the UCLA auditorium, Jeffrey Katzenberg, the CEO of DreamWorks Animation, suddenly interrupts the conversation with a question. Katzenberg—59 years old, V-neck sweater, pleated khakis—leans in close. “Taylor,” he says, “do you have two minutes? Will Smith wants to meet you.”

You can read the rest of the interview HERE, and scroll down for the rest of my favorite pictures.

Check out the rest of the photos HERE!

See more set photos of Rob and Reese here, here, and here!

Oh God.

When I first saw these new photos, they were instantly familiar to me. My lady parts know these pictures. Turns out, these are outtakes from the classic fuckhot GQ photo shoot.

Cover photo untagged:

*totally speechless*

You guys. My eyeballs can’t handle this level of hotness. My retinas are practically scorched.

See the magazine scans and a translation of the article over at Thinking Of Rob!

UNF.

See all 31 shots at Robert Pattinson Source!